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#18069
bettie
Teilnehmer

Compulsive gambling is not the addicts problem, but rather his solution for some serious underlying problem.
Interesting thought, don’t u think?
Just doing a little research, not working on my "homework" from my sponsor. I did some but really a lot of psycho babble. Relapse warning signs, come on! Lonelyness, defensiveness, bla bla bla! Now list 10 plans of action. Frankly, really, if i was bent on doing it I would look at the list, laugh and go.
Hopefully I would call someone. The other work sheets are more of the same.
Now you feel happy, excited, glad-signs of danger! relapse! What will u do?
Oh Come on!
So what are we suppose to do for the rest of our lives? No feeling. Period. Every waking moment we live in fear of relapse. Waiting for that one moment that wipes out days, weeks, years of recovery?
So I did my physical therapy. Had a nice talk with the therapist about my frustration. She took it easy on my thigh exercises. I am spending a lot of money I don’t really have for this therapy. I need to get what I am paying for but frankly I’m ready to give up. I could be spending this money for mental health co payments but I decided to work on this back first. Second guessing now but it’s too late. I don’t know, if I regain all my weight again I really don’t care if I gamble or not. I won’t have much life left if I do.
Condo is almost passable as clean, cats were of no assistance in cleaning the box!
Got massive stomach ache this afternoon. I have to work tomorrow, no matter what.
Church down the hill from my place has a sign "Addiction Recovery" starting 2/7, 7pm. Maybe I should check that out. Couldn’t hurt.
Can I ramble or what?
peace
bettie