I have been accessing my situation since I returned to my Old Ways six months ago.
The secret life during these last months, which I lived (existed) under the sinister shadow of gambling has caused me to lose precious time and far more money than I can afford or bear to admit.
I never mention figures on GT for obvious reasons.
My gambling has been funded by savings, earning and illicit loans.
Suffice to say, I lost all.
Despite the financial devastation , which by now is causing severe stress and affecting my day to day living, the biggest fallout has been the exacerbation of underlying health and the looming realization that Time is running out.
I have decided to call it a day. AGAIN!
Over the last few days/nights I lost and won. And lost. I prayed to God , in true CG desperation to "let me get something back" .
Long story,short, I have a fairly decent 3 figure sum "pending". Crumbs from the Rich Man's table of course but sufficient to cover last week's loss and to get me through Christmas.
My binge is over.
I made my peace with my Maker.
I am once again drawing the proverbial line under the Love/Hate Addiction that has stolen too much from me.
Today, I am taking back my life.
By God's Grace , I will not gamble, today.
Reading recent posts here on GT has rekindled my desire for freedom.
OVER AND OUT!