I am terrified!

I am finished. I have lost all my money. I used to own apartments in Prague, had my own contracting business in Ireland. Now I have nothing. My last bet was a few hours ago on plastic horses or virtual. I am thinking of Suicide, I cant get a rope I have in my Old Van out of my mind and I am sweating with fear and anxiety. Jesus help me, please God 

Why did I do this to myself? I know about adiction, I am 28 Years sober alcoholic. Now I want to end it. I was so proud and confident, now I am worthless. I want to write this, maybe nobody will ever read it, but at 55 sure my life is almost over anyway.

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note....

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you :-)

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

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Hi Downandout ,

So what would that achieve except heartbreak for all those who care about you ?

Another option is to brush yourself down and start again.

Please join some of the groups here and chat to others.

Life improves very quickly once we stop gambling.

You have not lost your ability to make money - just your ability to gamble in a controlled way.

I feel you deserve a massive pat on the back for coming on here and seeking help . Talk to others - you are I good company here - with others who have messed up the it lives until they decided enough .

It is hard to stop gambling but not impossible . THere is also residential help available through this site .

You can do what you propose anytime - isn’t it worth giving recovery a chance first ?

You r never too old to recover from a gambling addiction. I entered into recovery at 59, suicidal, ill, depressed etc. After five and a half years of complete destruction. You can come back from the worst situations. It works when we admit that we r powerless over gambling and that our lives have become unmanageable, and a higher power can bring us back to wellness. The aa steps work for gambling too. Come to the facilitated groups on here, go to GA.

I admitted that I was powerless over gambling - that my lives had become unmanageable.

I came to believe that a power greater than me could restore me to sanity.

I made a decision to turn my will and my lives over to the care of God as I understood Him.

Its never too late to start living life on our own terms. Gambling controlled our actions each and every day. There is something comforting and soothing knowing we no longer have to live through the stress of gambling. A sense of freedom knowing the higher power will give us the strength to power through our times of weakness as long as we ask.

Keep on fighting!