I'm a Gambling Addict and I need to get better for my 7 month old Son
This is my first post and I'm not sure really where to start. I've been gambling for about 12 years now and have had spikes throughout this time where I have gambled out of my control. In the past year or so it has risen to a whole new level and I have lost more than I'd ever thought possible. I estimate that I've lost $250k over the 12 year span... that's a quarter of a million dollars. It makes me sick. I cashed out all of my retirement accounts and maxed out all of my credit cards. I recently filed bankruptcy for 120k worth of loans/credit cards/ unpaid taxes. I will be making payments to a bankruptcy trustee for the next 5 years. They budgeted our family income so we will have enough for the bare necessities. All excess income will go to the court to repay my creditors.My wide is aware of the bankruptcy and thinks its due to poor financial management and debt from our wedding. She knows that I occasionally gamble but she doesn't know the extent of it. We will have no xcess money for 5 years and I feel awful as I have a 7 month old child and I feel like he will suffer the most as he won't have a great early childhood. The worst part is I am stil l gambling! I lost 1800 on Friday and 500 yesterday. I am borrowing money from relatives to pay my mortgage. I can't stop. I've called 1800 gamblers. Ive done the virtual meetings due to the coronavirus. I I want to provide a better life for my family. I just feel like a huge failure. At one point in March, I was up 90K gambling... and I lost it all plus another 30K. Everytime I think about it, I want to puke. And I don't know if I should open up to my wife. I'm afraid she will leave me and take the baby if I do. I want to get better and get a new start after bankruptcy. I feel that if I can get my finances under control, I can put our family in a better place and I may not have to put my wife through finding out. I want to get your opinions on if I should tell her or not? I called 1-800 gambler and they suggested I try to fix the issue (my gambling addicition) and then decide if I tell her.