never not will end
I gambled first when i was 12 years old. Now ave 43 and still i have a strong gambling addiction. I had longer breaks , i was always a very good student . but do to gambling
at 22 i was alcoholic , i took my last exams on the college after few beers and a bottle of vodka. Its the third country where im living , more then 6 years. im working really
hard , for nothing all money are going to my gambling addiction or debt collectors. still i have my family near me , i dont know how long . First time was small ammounts
but after i begin it to have bigger wage , so bigger loans . Last two years i lost around 150 k euro . im afraid i will finish alone on the street , good cause im not suicidal.
Last time i relapsed two days ago around 3k. After a loose i take a lot of medicine to keep me calm . I think i try it everything to stop gambling. Software, i dont own my bank account ,
always i found a way to gamble, also the sites found. This time i borrow it 3k in cryptocurrency, to pay some loans and the transfer delayed one day so i begin it to gamble.
After ten hours i doubled my ammount, i did not sleep all night , i goes to work , and when arrived home i said i will put 100 euro. In 2 hours i lost everything. I think for me
no chance to recover, im very disappointed by myself.
But i write here a line , if i will gamble one more time even 1 euro , i take the first airplane to one of the most dangerous place in Africa like a volunteer , and i will stay there
and i will stay there for two years , to get enough adrenaline for all my life. I will keep what i promise.