Originally posted by Velvet
… We know the addiction to gamble has no cure and if we thought there was one, then we would not be accepting the addiction …
Good morning all, both my fellow gamblers and others from the Friends & Family side,
My name is Larry and I am a compulsive gambler, my last bet was October 17, 20012.
Today holds a lot of emotion for me as well as reasons to celebrate some aspects of my recovery. Firstly, I am again starting my day by celebrating not gambling yesterday, and having sincere hopes and a strong desire to not gamble today — it is a One Day At A Time process.
Following that, today is my 4 year anniversary of joining Gambling Therapy. However, joining was not for me to start my journey of recovery, that came the following day. I mentioned in the past my reasons for going online and searching out a source that offered help in gambling problems, but will repeat them here today. I felt that I needed to associate myself with an organization as a justifiable defense against some check fraud charges that I was facing — an act I now see as one of a compulsive gambler’s "great schemes". After joining GT and documenting my efforts to get help I felt so good that I went out to celebrate, need I say that the way I choose was to gamble — again an act I now can connect to the Gamblers Anonymous program in that it was my SHOUTING out a strong yes to their Question19 of the "Twenty Questions", "Did you ever have an urge to celebrate any good fortune by a few hours of gambling?".
So today is also the eve of a most significant event of my life. After spending the entire day of August 12, 2009 and continuing throughout the entire night on a gambling binge where I only dug myself in deeper and allowed for even more suffering and misery. I then started on a true journey of recovery. The gambling and great loss may have been the last straw the helped lead up to this new beginning, but the one thing that was the real turning point was my decision to not end it all by stepping into an oncoming Metro train — again a yes answer to GA’s 20 Questions, #20, "Did you ever consider self destruction or suicide as a result of your gambling?".
I instead got on the train and returned home a broken man in search of help. It was then that I logged onto GT and was given the advice that has helped me progress by my starting to use the 3G’s that I mention in all of my closings here, I was told to join GA. I searched out a meeting place, and found one right around the corner of my apartment. Four days later on that Monday night of August 17, 2009, I went to my first meeting. For GA the 17th was my "clean date" but I unknowingly used the 13 as it was my actual "last day" to gamble, or my clean date at that time. But for me, the day I celebrate above all others is still Aug 13, 2009; even though I gambling again and had to change my GA clean date".
But it all began 4 years ago today when I thought I was being so smart with an attempt to get over by joining GT, when actually my scheme was a hidden blessing that opened the door for me to accept my addiction and work at keeping it arrested as I progress day by day — "Compulsive gambling is an illness, progressive in nature, which can never be cured, but can be arrested", and we "can recover if we follow a simple program", a program that is provided by GT, GA, and other proven organizations.
Thanks for the time and space for me to celebrate this day, and to celebrate life.
God’s speed. Stay strong. Keep aware, Keep progressing.
LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.