I literally read every single post on this thread & I can only hope that I can be as strong as you @Jvr3419! My husband has forgiven me since I confessed to him about my addiction & how bad our finances are. Sad part is I gambled away my paycheck earlier today online. I just installed blockers and wish I had done that earlier. I have yet to tell him about the money from today. I’m sitting here thinking about another lie just to get by until next payday. At some point, he won’t forgive me and that’s when I don’t know what I’ll do. I’ve been listening to podcasts and YouTube videos about gambling addiction. I know it’s weird to say but I find some peace in knowing I am not alone because I can tell you that it defintely feels that way everyday. I am constantly thinking about this and it makes me depressed. My thoughts are focused on how I am going to stop completely. I don’t trust myself with money. I need to give my husband full control of the money that comes in. I am lost and wandering in a place thag is unfamiliar & I’m afraid.
