Hi Lowlow
I understand why you felt you needed a break and I hope you are feeling better for it.
What is your partner doing to learn to control his addiction? On this site we offer fantastic help for those who want to be gamble-free. Charles is an amazing facilitator for gambler-only groups where your partner can feel safe and understood. We also have a Helpline for him and for you. There are GA (gamblers anonymous) meetings where again he will receive understanding. I believe in a gambler taking all the support he can get – not every path to recovery will suit everybody but I know that all the supports I have mentioned offer great success stories.
It must be very hard for your son; he cannot be expected to understand his father’s problem when his father will not be understanding it himself. Are your sons seeing their father?
With treatment, your partner can begin to understand the severity of what his addiction has done to his family but following successful treatment, there shouldn’t be any need to dwell on what has gone before. The past can be used as a reference only, with guilt and blame left at the door. Your partner is not and has not, deliberately hurt you or his children. His reality has been changed by an addiction that he neither asked for nor wanted.
Maybe your partner could look at Gordon Moody (GMA) – there is information about it lower down the forum page. I know from experience how successful GMA is in turning the lives around for so many gamblers. If you, or he, wants any further information about it, please ask our Helpline or pop into one of my Friends and Family groups where you will be most welcome. They are safe and we communicate in real time.
Keep posting, you are being heard and understood
Velvet