hello, just an update to what has developed so far in my journey I got one of my small payments today. Eventually, I decided to pay nearly half of what I owed to capital as discussed previously. Usually by this time, I pay off my smaller credit card in full and then go on to gamble the credit card’s money plus my own money, but I haven’t tried doing that tonight. The reason why I paid off half right now, not full is because I didn’t want to feel as If I lost a lot of money from my account, and this could potentially trick my mind into thinking that I have to recover this money back from slots and I know this story has been played over and over in my mind and the result is always the same, lose it all, then put more out of my pocket and then play every week or two from other direct deposits until I hit the wall. I want to break this cycle by doing something different. I will pay off the other half either next week or before the deadline. I read about the pink cloud syndrome in one of the other posts and I could relate to that. I have had good and positive feelings ever since I decided to be gambling free. I am not sure how long this feeling will last but I will do everything I can in my power to limit my access to money and to places where I could gamble. I am almost 2 weeks in without gambling. Cheers to everyone who are striving to do better and who have been successful in their journeys of gambling free life.
