I’m finally in my cottage permanently which is really nice. My living situation was horrible for the last year being in a rv trailer. It’s a big one so it was doable but it was not fun for alot of reasons. All I no is after the fiasco with my family and making me sell my half of the inherited home I had I will never coown a home with anyone ever again. I still miss that house everyday. But onwards I go. Unfortunately I live in the most expensive place in Canada so I definitely won’t be buying a house by myself for along time. I’m ok with that though as my last house was a fortune to run and upkeep. At least renting I can pay off my debts and continue saving money which is really important for me right now. I can’t beat where I live either I have a beautiful ocean view and 1/2 acre of private land to myself so I’m extremely thankful everyday for that. I thought I’d get emotional finally being in the cottage since it took me months to renovate and fix up but im not. At least it’s what I wanted for myself and I get a discounted rent because I did all the work. Hard work pays off and I’m so glad my addiction was not present during this time or I’d never of finished the place. Working hard on maintaining abstinence and doing the therapy I need have really helped my life improve alot. Though I might feel lonely I’m not lost anymore which is a huge difference for me. I no once I’m healed the way I should be from my past relationship and trauma work ill be able to bring someone into my life again. It’s definitely not fair to introduce someone into my life when im not fully healthy especially someone like me with alot of past addictions. I’m hoping I can force myself to be alone for a least a full year I’m at 8 months of being gamblefree so its really not that long to keep doing more work on myself.
