Thanks for sharing your story. Aside from the gambling, I think one of the biggest steps you can take is starting to love yourself. Your life is worth living. You will not always be alone, you will find people that care for you and want to see you do well. However, I truly believe until we love ourselves and treat ourselves with kindness we will never get that love and kindness in return from others.
Maybe you could add in some exercise (if you don’t already) into your daily schedule. That will definitely help with making you feel better both mentally an physically.
Keep it up!
