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Hi Ghunter

I’m sorry that your post seems to have been muddled with someone else and that you have not had the reply that you deserve.

I think it is good that you want to share with your husband and I understand your feeling of being overwhelmed at the thought.

It is possible that your husband already knows that you have some sort of concern, I speak as a non-gambler who was told after many years of worry what the problem was – I was then able to process it and learn to understand.

Understanding is not and probably cannot be immediate, there may well be angry words. It is important to realise that your husband will need time to digest your message.

I think that it is good to say to him that you are seeking and getting support, that you are not prepared to allow your problem to keep controlling your life.

Maybe you could tell him that you are unhappy with the person you have become, that you didn’t ask for or want this problem in your life. Non-gamblers generally have no understanding until they are confronted by it, but they can learn.

Maybe you could show him this site. I facilitate the Friends and Family group and I would be delighted to welcome your husband if he wanted to come and talk.

We do have a terrific group for gamblers too, run by Charles. He would welcome you and support you through these difficult early days.

Do not despair, you have taken a massive step writing your first post. Admitting to yourself that you have a problem is excellent, sharing with your husband is understandable more difficult.

Allow him to spit a few feathers, after all he is only just hearing that which you have known for some time. I did everything wrong for all the right reasons because I was unaware what the problem was – once I knew I was I able to support the right way.

Please keep posting and hopefully join Charles in his group. I will follow your progress in the forum and I wish you well.