Hi jvr3419,
Thank you for replying. I knew you were sharing with me a very real problem.
I used to warn very new inexperience therapists many years ago, if they want to bring me back to my past trauma and unhealed emotions
I need them to be skilled enough to bring me back into the present when they are finish otherwise I will be in deep troubles
when you bring them back, I do not know how to make them go away and I could not handle those emotions.
I do not know any other ways to manage those pain except acting out in substance and behavior to escape.
I am no longer the young man 26 years old, I am 57 now.
I am ok and ready to face my past trauma and unhealed emotions.
After reading your post 2 weeks ago
I did revisit some of my past and felt those same emotions
I was able to process them.
I thought about the time when I was young, I grew up in a poor family; I am really very afraid to be poor later.
I cannot go out to play with my friends because I need to stay home;
I cannot join my schoolmates for outing because I do not have money;
One day I sneak out to play games at the arcade, I came home and get a very hard beating.
I also thought about the time 30 years ago, when I was hurt very badly after a break up with someone,
I was heart broken and depress for many years.
I was able to accept them and I have learn to let go.
I was fine to talk about them; I can smile about them now.
I am sure there are many other painful emotions in my lifetime that I need to work on in recovery due to my many years of dark past and experience. I am a work in progress and under construction.