[asdfghost]

Hey iamhere,

First of all. Thank you so much for your kind words. To be honest, I missed your posts. And I’m glad you came over, at least for a moment.
What’s winning for me? That’s a question I’ve never asked myself, no matter how strange it sounds, but that’s how it is.
But I know better than anything about losing. Because that’s how it goes pretty much all the time in my life. I wish I was completely wrong on this one. But the inner feeling tells me that I’m not.
Who would care about the big goals if I cannot maintain the most basic ones like getting a job and being useful. For myself, not for others even.
I need to do better. Easier said than done. But I already tasted the other option, and now I’m fed up.