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Hey guys, wondering of any of you are still active here.
I havent been on the forums for 5 or 6 months i think. Im back because i have spent the last few months losing everything again.

The last 3 weeks as soon as I got paid, I went to the slots and lost my entire pay immediately and struggled to eat during the week because of it. Each time, i promised myself i would quit and started counting the days but then as soon as i got paid again i went straight back and gambled.

Its been 4 days since i gambled but then i borrowed 70$ off my friend today which was meant to be for food and i pay him back next week on payday. I ended up gambling that 70$ and lost it and now all i can think of is finding someone else to borrow money from so i can gamble it and hopefully get the money back i just lost. If it wasnt the weekend, i wouldve gotten a pay advance from a high interest pay day loan company which is a terrible idea.

As im writing all this, i feel like it all sounds so pathetic and maybe this is what i needed. I have been thinking about these forums for the past month or so but kept telling myself i am quitting gambling and it just doesnt seem to work. So after losing my mates money i decided it was time to come back.

I just wanna see if there’s anyone that might have some words of advice for me, why do i keep changing my mind as soon as money shows up in my account again and what are steps that people take to stop this irrational behaviour.

I consider myself quite intelligent yet i continue to lose everything i own to a game that was invented to take money from people. How am i caught up in this nonsense, i come across dumb people that even look at me like theres something wrong with me. It now seems they are the smart ones and im the idiot, how did i get to this point..

Sorry once again for just spewing words out, i am going to make it a habit of checking back here every day in hopes that some advice might sink in and i might be able to move on into the next stage of my life. I have been doing this for too many years now. I am also sorry if this all seems pathetic to the people that have lost way more than me, although i do feel like ive lost everything including my own sanity through all this.

Looking forward to reading any help out there