I had to smile and nod my head alot reading this! My cg, has only once bought presents for family in his life, I suspect now, after a win, so we were lucky that year! I, though, have bought them for him to give to people! We no longer expect presents from him. I remember my cg being ‘lectured’ about his life from successful relatives and his nearest and dearest being astounded by the rubbish and bullshit coming of his mouth. I remember running around trying to make it ‘all work’, keeping everything running smoothly. As well as my cg disappearing off to friends with money from his christmas cards, we also had my ex to deal with and his antics. So as we head off to this christmas, I will ‘plan’ to head off the addiction and be more relaxed in the knowledge I have gained from this site. The relatives who asked questions and came from an ‘ego state’ are no longer in our lives and will be no where to be seen this year. I will do my bit and ‘look after myself’ and my needs, and if it means taking time out, I will. My children are young adults and can entertain themselves if need be. Wishing everyone a good christmas and remembering its only 24 hours! Take care and keep smiling. San