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#5362
vera
Participant

Hi Logic,
I haven’t posted for a while (due to bad internet, power cuts and good weather) but I have read your posts.
A “clean”break is never what it says on the box (look at Brexit LOL!)
Break ups are often difficult, painful, sad and “dirty”.
You are making 4 breaks.
One with your job.
The other with your location.
Third with your “guy”,
Fourth with your CG’s addiction.
I have been through similar breaks in life and I have also experienced the ultimate break, Death ( being a golden oldie)
I can tell you there is no easy route and there are “break ups” in life that are more difficult than death.
Why? because the S.O is still there to haunt us.
Your CG is playing all the games. He knows the knock on effects when he chooses to ignore you. He knows when to be apologetic. He knows how his self pity and sulking will tug on your heart strings. He says all the right things.
When a CG speaks of how badly his bets are going, he really means ” I need to try harder/bet more to resolve this”. When he says “Things will never change I will always need to bet” he means “I’m going to use my CG label as an excuse to continue gambling. I don’t intend stopping (at least , not now”). When he roars/swears/ verbally abuses you , he is saying “Get out of my way. You are cramping my style/ it’s all your fault”. When he posts “send to many videos/texts” he is laughing inside, knowing the person he intended them for will read/watch and walk straight into his trap.
Words mean nothing to a CG so spare your words. Action is all we understand.Having our gambling supplies cut off is the greatest dread for a CG.

Stop walking into his traps, Logic. There are many ways, apart from money that a CG gains enablement. He may be setting traps unconsciously but you need to be aware of the danger they impose.

The ONLY way you will succeed in living a new life is to leave every little bit of him behind.
I know how difficult that is.
When I walked away from gambling, I returned many times.
Why?
Because I left part of myself in the casinos.
I know I said this before. Don’t leave any part of yourself behind.
Pack up. Move on. Broken hearts heal. Wounds and scars fade. You will learn new coping skills as you move forward in life.
If you allow your CG or his addiction to continuously open your wounds, they will fester and never heal.
Gambling is a progressive illness.
He is wearing his “victim’s cloak”. His choice. Not your problem today.
Kiss him good bye (on the cheek) and move on!
It’s called TOUGH LOVE!