So it’s not quite a full day yet but its close. I immediately installed gamban on my laptop after yesterday’s post. I’ve had it on my phone for a bit already. I feel on and off like I wish I hadn’t because I want to play but that’s exactly why I needed to do it. Thank you everyone for your support. I’ll try to post here daily. I have been checking in to read some every day but havent been very active yet in the forum.
I have been trying to get myself back into other hobbies to distract, and have made a payment plan to pay off what debt I accrued for my family. I acknowledged the problem before it got too out of hand so in the next 6 months we should be through it. I lost about $6500 total since August of this year. The bulk of it has been in the last 40 days with me betting sometimes up to $250 a day. I’m focusing on getting back to a good financial place and keeping my husband in the loop every step.
I have also contacted a counseling service offered through my husbands work that will work with me on Grief and loss to work through my mother’s passing in a healthier way, and also help me with more tools regarding my compulsive/addictive tendencies.
Thank you again everyone who’s posted here. I do have a strong support system around me, but no one understands an addict better than an addict so it’s great to have a system that knows the lies my brain tells me every day and has been through it.