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I’ve just received a call from Gordon Moody that I have a confirmed placement for June ! Whoa !
Shock, Horror, Fear ! I don’t know now……

My head is in a spin…. I feel so nervous. I have a battle going on. I must do this. It is my only chance yet the demons are fighting back cos they know I’m going to war with them now !
This is not easy. I feel maybe I’m not ready.

I’ve just started this big journey. I haven’t done enough yet. I have to face my payday at the end of this month. I haven’t blocked or self excluded from sites. I’ve always kept a backdoor open. I am in a tizz.

I have to do the right things to snap out of this and do what I know I should to secure my salary and take action to STOP for GOOD ! This has come so soon. I was expecting it but maybe it is a good thing that I don’t get a chance to fall off the wagon again ? Struggling to come to terms with this today. It’s like giving up my favourite toy that I’ve been hanging onto for years and has been my comfort, my escape, my life !

Appreciate any support I can get now…..please….. I am so scared…..