Hi everyone,
thank you for you comments of support.
I had every intention of going on to chat last night but I was exhausted. I actually went to bed at 7pm when I took my son up. I think the exhaustion is due to the emotions I have been through over the past week or so.
I kept myself fairly busy yesterday, managed to do around a third of my essay. My degree is history. I decided to enroll around the time I stopped gambling in the past. I figured it would be a good distraction and keep me busy along with my full time job. It certainly worked initially.
I know that I use gambling as a distraction from boredom and loneliness although deep down I know its more than that. I use it to fill the time to avoid thinking about things and having to face them. This is something that I will be working on next year.
I cleaned the house from top to bottom and actually put away my piles of washing. I feel that that was a big achievement yesterday, haha.
I made a healthyish tea of slimey sausages (sausages in onion gravy), cauliflower cheese and veg. Im going to try and make better meals as my diet has been pretty poor of late, mainly chocolate and diet coke.
Throughout the day I had many thoughts of gambling but managed to tell my irrational mind to ‘bog off’, I’m proud that I silenced her yesterday but I’m under no illusions that it will always be so easy.
Todays plan is to crack on with my essay and hopefully do at least another third. I also borrowed a book from the library at the school I work at that I’ve had since before the summer. My plan is to read some of that so I can finally return it when we go back next week. I’m meeting up with a friend this evening so I don’t think I will make it to the new members chat tonight but will aim for the one later in the week.
I hope everyone has a positive day today