#3702
nomore 56
Participant

Hi dcor, I was wondering how you are doing. No, you are not complaining. What is going on with your wife is all too familiar for everyone who deals with a cg. Her addiction is very upset with you right now because you are threatening it by not believing the lies anymore. If you are on to it, it will be more difficult for the beast to frolic undisturbed. What you are saying is as much white noise to her than her angry accusations re not trusting her are to you. Arguments don’t do a thing for you. Neither does trying to keep tabs on her. Addicts live in their own world and believe what they are saying. Try to take care of YOU, pay the bills to make sure YOU are safe from her actions. My hb was outraged that I didn’t trust him and we argued all the time. At the end this made him mad and gave him reason to go and gamble. “If she doesn’t trust me I might as well do what she thinks I’m doing anyways.” I ended up just shrugging my shoulders and told him that I could not and would not trust a word he was saying unless he proved otherwise. I also told him at the end that the only thing I wanted from him was to show me enough respect to not expect me to believe what he was trying to sell me. I had to leave the room to end the conversation right then and there. Sometimes refusing to take part in this charade is the only thing that’s left. Indifference did the trick for me. No matter how furious I was, I just didn’t want to waste my time anymore. If her car has 1 or 4 flat tires she will find a way to either get help or contact you. And frankly, what she is willing to accept from you makes not one bit of a difference to either one of you. The only thing she needs to accept is that she is a cg and is hurting the both of you until she is willing to seek some kind of help. Your posts bring up a lot of memories for me so that’s why I write lengthy replies :}