I know I dithered for a long time before going to GA meetings – but I had tried almost everything else before I got there. I also had an idea that a) I wasn’t a real gambler because my vice was mainly slots and only sports betting was real gambling; and b) that I hadn’t lost enough to “qualify” even though by this time I had lost enough to pay cash for a small house!
I made contact by phone first – so I wonder if that is a small step you could take, and ask questions of people before you take the next step of getting to a meeting.
You will be made to feel welcome – and you will hear other people’s stories before you are asked to share yours – and you can say as much or as little as you want – even just to confirm your first name and how long it has been since your last bet.
GA is not for everyone – I no longer attend – but for the years I was there I went to several meetings (at one point as many as 7 a week) and if nothing else it took me to a place where I couldn’t gamble (most of my gambling took place in the evenings.) I still think it is the best route for people at the start of their recovery from gambling – and if it continues to work then why stop. For me I needed to understand myself more which is why I went down the route of counselling and co-counselling, but that may be for later.
So don’t put it off. Take the first step of making a call. Go to one meeting, then go to two (perhaps a different one) and then make a decision to continue or not. But if it is not then ensure that you have some other form of support for yourself, it is so hard to beat this thing alone.
Again – if addiction is the word that works for you then use it. That might change as you do, within your recovery. At this stage take up everything you can with both hands and put all the effort into your recovery. Take being in recovery even more seriously than you took your gambling – then you will make it, I’m sure. Go well.