I always had a dream that I could win it all. The dream turned into a nightmare because I was in a delusion. Forcing me to the first step will help me to feel better with myself. I know that I cant continue like this. I got thrown out last dec at my gf house over gambling. Almost a year ago and couldn’t stop if I had a gun pointed at me. That is so sad. I needed to face reality not a fantasy like winning the bank. Day 1 seems like a forever sentence because you feel gambling is natural like drinking a cup of coffee but it can destroy everything and does not give you anything back but lost dreams.
