Can’t say I had a thought for gambling today but then I’ve had so much to do.
Checked to see if the fish were still happy and alive and ended up emptying another 20 buckets of pond water, cleaning the silt and sludge from the bottom of the pond and running tap water into the pond. Mr frog raised his head and body out of the water, rested on the side of the pond, above the water surface camouflaged and stared at me, thinking I couldn’t see him. It was good to see that my efforts paid off and there is still plenty wildlife in the pond. But that hard work left me sweating with backache and a strain on my troubled shoulder.
The prospect of going into GMA has kicked me into action and got me to spring clean the house and attend to long overdue tasks, neglected from gambling which I’ve never had the inkling or motivation to do.
Somehow it seems as if my world is changing to ‘normal’ and I need to take care of all these things and put things right. So I worked till midnight doing as much as I can. Tomorrow I hope to continue to tackle the chores around the house.
I hope I get the chance to unpack the many boxes and cases with clothes which I haven’t touched since moving in 6 months ago. My main priority was gambling and anything that required too much effort was never going to stand in my way of gambling. I seemed to have done just what I had to around the house to keep me from content and not overwhelmed by the state of the house. My normal self always needs to have my house clean with things in place or it tortures me and I can’t go out before doing so. Strange how I adapted to accommodate my gambling, changing how I lived and who I was, even my lifestyle.
The thought of going to GMA has changed my perspective and I’m getting back to being prim and proper and need to get my house in order and things sorted. I could never bear my neighbours coming in to look after my cats with everything disorderly. I plan to confiscate any letters or signs of my troubled gambling life. They do not know and will never know. They will always see my ‘happy go lucky’, ‘got it together’ face.
So I continue a day closer to my summit……..onwards and upwards……
Just for today, I’m still gamble free.