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Welcome to this site and I hope it will be at least part of what you are looking for. Just a quick thought, also, about the GA meetings. You are finding them a bit repetitive and that the other members are not really exploring things in depth – the problems, struggles etc perhaps. I just wonder if you have explained what you are looking for? Some of the others may have got into a bit of a ‘rut’ and are (hopefully) coping well now, but I imagine there will be some really strong stories behind the current ‘successes’ – could you try somehow to encourage more sharing of past experiences and struggles? Ask what they have been through? What helped them? What kind of thoughts and feelings did they have to overcome? etc. If you say it is because you want to get to a ‘good place’ yourself and would value knowing more of how they got there, it might draw them out. Who knows, maybe some of them are also hiding a bit and long for more ‘reality’!

On the other hand, maybe this will not work – you will read on here that some people love the meetings and others do not get so much from them. In that case, you turn to where you can get the right help for you. Have you attended the group sessions here? Click on Support Groups at the top of the page and find out when the groups take place and just log in when you can. And, of course, keep writing and reading on the forum – and maybe also other reading that will help, as Mickey suggests.

Your gambling goes way back to a time when you were vulnerable and needed some kind of ‘escape’. There is a whole road of recovery to follow now, one step at a time. It can take a while to really feel you are launched on this new journey, but, when you really search for the best ways forward, you will find them, I think.

All good wishes,