Hello jenny
I just read your post my dear,
I can feel how difficult it is when the time comes and texts or calls starts. How difficult is to manage our anger and sadness and say no to the addiction and cole the door for one more time .
I can see a lady who said no to the addiction and that is a win jenny.
I can see a lady who is defiantly determined not to go back
I can see a lady who knows what to do to protect herself and her children
I can see a lady who has knowledge about the addiction and she is wise
But I can see a lady who is straggling because she loves her cg and want him back deep inside her.
And I know my jenny that this is the most difficult thing to say, no to someone you want and love .
Some things are very hard sometimes but we can get up …and someday just feel free.
The medication (you know it) is to do things for you, go out, meet friends and why not and new people in your life ….that is what makes us stronger and stronger
Sometimes we are in the edge and sometimes we are more fragile but from my little experience with the addiction I know that when I stand up from something I was fragile I feel stronger.
Your recovery my jenny is your most precious thing in your life because when you feel totally free from this you will have win that nothing in the future will be so hard for not deal with it. And your children can see and learn from this that nothing is unsolved we need faith and love for ourselves and we can go further as much we are hurt.
When I was a teenager my father (he is dead know) I was in his arms and I told him a big problem I had . he told me what was the solution I was choosing and I told him and I was right for the solution and then he hug me and he told me that the hard thing is my baby to get well and recover after the solution .. He said to me that now is the time to cry a lot and find your relief ….time is the doctor .
I thing that now we are in this path here you and I know the solutions and we try to recover from this ..
All together I believe that we can go better … the help the understanding here and the advises and the others experiences is the best thin g we have here
Give yourself jenny the credits you are doing so well , I can feel the difficulty and ups down and the loneliness but I know that we can earn our selves back
I’m sending you a big hug and hope peace in our souls.
With all my love ell