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You can stop. I won’t lie, its not easy. But there is no shame here, just honesty. Honesty of others really helps. If you have urges, or follow through with the urges, just post on here or seek help in the chat rooms. My story isn’t far off from yours, with the secret online gambling and mine has developed over many years. I’m nearly two months gamble free and life is definitely getting better. I am enjoying simple things in life again, such as having roast dinner or watching tv.. It felt weird at first which maybe feel like I would never get past it. Figuring out what to do with myself day to day when I would’ve been gambling. It just got easier as the weeks have gone on. Keep posting : )