It sounds like you have had some horrible things to cope with. I do hope you get to Velvet’s group, where I am sure you will find the right support in this. I think you are doing really well to ‘temper’ your reply. You can obviously discuss your contact in more detail in the group, but I am just wondering if you need to write much at all right now? It looks like you partner is off-loading a lot of his stuff, which he feels the need to do, but it may be best to put it aside and concentrate on nurturing yourself. I am sure Velvet will have useful ideas on this to discuss with you. The addiction can be very cruel, as you are finding, and also so irrational and manipulative.