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Reading your story and it’s all too familiar brother. I’m 29
Now and have been gambling on and off for 10 years. We start off betting small 20-50$ and we get so upset when we lose. Then we become desensitized to the value of a dollar and start betting thousands. It’s a sick disease but the good thing is we are in control of it if we truly want to quit. For me in was casinos, roulette and blackjack. I know all about chasing losses , even when we get our money back to
Even , we think we can be smarter with our gambling but in reality we just end up losing it all again and more. I’d say I’ve lost well over 200k since I’ve been 18, my
Most recent binge of 2 months was about 60k in and out of my hands at the casino, winning and then losing it all and then chasing and then winning it back and losing it all again. It’s actually the wind that hurt us most, we feel invinsinle, we feel on top of the world, very empowering feeling . But oh boy do this ever losses hurt, we self loath, we get depressed, can’t focus on our jobs, school, relationships, it’s really sad. We have to realize that there’s a life outside gambling, a life of happiness (think back before you started betting , how much less stressed you were). It’s so hard to earn a buck and we just throw it all away in a couple
Of hours, hoping on the flip of a card or a sports match to help us get rich. I suggest you seek help brother, block yourself from all online betting site, open up to your gf, family, for support. It seems like you have a good life , young, educated, and good people in your corner. The good thing is also you are still young enough to recover from this financial loss and you can get the money back in no time. But if you continue man, you will lose a lot more of your money, your youth, and your mental health when these should be some of the best years of your life. I went 40 days gamble free until New Years, relapsed and lost about 3k in an hour playing blackjack, now I stared over again and I’m on day 16. Next time you have the urge to bet, just remember the feeling of losing. Remember it’s not worth it. There is a life outside of this addiction and it can be so beautiful . I know it seems like it’s all we know is to gamble, but I truly believe we can overcome this disease through hard work and determination. We are all in your corner. Keep posting , keep your journal active, we will battle these demons together. God bless you