I think just the fact that she gambled during my last two trips (3, and 4 years ago) unsettled me. For the same reason I excused myself on a few trips that my boss had wanted me to go and I asked a Junior Engineer to take my place.
In the past couple of months my wife communicated to a gambler friend of hers and one time I overheard about repaying a loan but wasn’t sure from whom to whom. My wife said her friend is paying her back some money. I don’t want my wife to be in touch with these gambling friends so the fact that she is talking to them concerns me. Recently my wife also disappears for long periods of time at work which is also a red flag.
Thank you very much Velvet. I know that my anxiety is unhealthy and I am trying to overcome it.