CG’s distort what is said to them but I completely agree that if someone is feeling worthless and that view is backed up by others it can never be good.
I am of the opinion that your father was right to tell him that his habit was hurting others because your son’s behaviour is unacceptable but I’m afraid that telling him to pull himself together would not have helped because he doesn’t know how.
He is young and hopefully has not sunk totally into his addiction – on the other hand he will not have had time to become really hurt by his actions. Enablement will feed your son’s addiction and I do hope you can stand strong against bailing him out – his addiction is incredibly manipulative and your resolve will be tested.
I look forward to your update.