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Hi Duranie

I am on holiday at the moment which makes it difficult for me to give your post the attention it deserves. However, I want you to know that you have been heard and understood.

It is important, in my opinion, that while your partner is with his mother that you give yourself a lot of ‘me’ time, see friends and family, do things that give you pleasure and help you regain your strength which will have been diminished by this sad experience.

I believe that it is important, for those who have a gambler in their lives, that they gain as much knowledge as possible about the addictionto gamble so that they can cope well.

How did your partner take control of his addiction before? Did he go to GA or rehab? I ask this because one of the biggest problem for recovering gamblers is complacency and I wondered if your partner had begun to believe he could now gamble responsibly having distanced himself from his support over time.
A slip is not necessarily a negative for a gambler, it can bolster a determination to live truly gsmble-free when the shock of what he has done and lost, sets in.

Unfortunately for you, a great deal of money has been lost and exciting plans have been ruined. However, money is not the reason an addicted man gambles, it is the ‘gamble’ that excites him.

What, if anything, is your partner saying now? Do you know his mother’s reaction?

I will leave this here in the hope that it gives you some support knowing you are being heard.

I am back next week and will look for you and hopefully ‘meet’ you in our F&F group.

I know a man can successfully control his addiction which is why i an writing to you now.

Speak soon