It is really hard for someone who comes from an addiction free environment to understand it. If the addiction to gamble had not entered our lives without invitation, I doubt many of us would have been aware of it, or understood what it is like to live with it, either.
I think it is good that your boyfriend is talking about his concerns because it means the subject is out into the open – far better than ignoring something that ‘could’ affect you both if you haven’t dealt with it. I appreciate that he leaves you feeling worse sometimes – I know what it is like to hear unhelpful comments.
I have my thinking cap on to properly consider the question you have asked about how to talk to your boyfriend and I will write again soon.
Keep posting and ask anything you want to know