I am the mom of a compulsive gambler and I too live in Western Canada:) I am so sorry that you find yourself in this situation… it really sucks!
Your husband still is a wonderful man but he is also an addict. Trying to love the husband hate the addict can be virtually impossible hence, wanting to rip his head off. Here is a place where nothing you say will shock or surprise anybody. I think it is so important to acknowledge it and get it off your chest as living in the chaos that a gambler can create has us thinking we are losing our minds. You can get some perspective listening and talking/writing to others!
As Velvet says the shaming, swearing etc. do no good… they can not hear you. The most important thing to do is to remove ANY access to money, credit etc that you can. At least this gives you control of the financial well being of you and your girls. Only he can decide this is a problem for him and that he needs help. However, by cutting off his access to money and not engaging in the lies, manipulation and general chaos you may be able to help him reach that point.
I would also suggest you see if you have a Gam Anon in your area… it has been an invaluable source of support for me!
Take Care and keep posting!
Cathy