How much I appreciated your post.
You do deserve to be loved and treated as an equal – hopefully soon you can turn the miserable experience you have had into something good for yourself and your children. You are strong even if you don’t feel it yet. In my opinion, if being a little less tolerant means learning to say ‘no’ then it is a good thing to learn – something that many of us have had to discover the hard way.
Please don’t waste energy thinking that if you had done things differently the results for the CG, who has turned your life upside down, might have been better – you surrounded yourself with knowledge and you made an informed decision – you could not have been fairer, especially with two young children to protect. I am glad that Twilight has written to you, she offers a unique insight into what it is like to be the child of a CG.
Of course no one could, or should, judge you and if there are those that try then take comfort from knowing that unasked for criticism says more about them than about you. Give yourself time to rebuild your self-esteem and regain your confidence. Don’t waste your time trying to make sense of the senseless but enjoy finding yourself again – you certainly should like the person you find, she sounds very special to me.
Thank you for your post, I am sure it will help others.