Hi M
Your use of the word ‘need’ was spot on in your post. ‘If’ he truly wants to stop he will ‘need’ treatment. He has, in my opinion, proved that his way doesn’t work but many CG believe that abstinence is recovery and have to find out the hard was that it is not enough. A slip does not have to be viewed negatively though; it can be an incentive to try harder and more importantly to try something different. He said he could do it on his own but he has not succeeded thus giving you a great opening to encourage him to seek the right support.
It is great that he has had a gamble-free time, a time for him to remember that he was lighter in his heart, that his relationship with you was healthier – and more importantly for you I know, that his relationship with his daughter bloomed. He can have this time every day but I feel he requires direction. I believe you could do with more support from within his home and I look forward to an update on that but I do know how hard that will be.
I believe that maybe this has been good for you, he was being very convincing and it is easy to slip back and forget – that is the sheer devilment of this addiction and no reflection on you.
I’m sorry you couldn’t get back in – I believe the group is locked in the final 5, 10 or so minutes. Speak soon.
V
