if I am reading your post correctly, you paid the balance of the holiday without it being in mind that he would be going and without an agreement with him at that stage to pay – that is not enabling. Or if you paid it in that knowledge it would have been.
Enabling would have been if you had agreed to pay the balance knowing that he would be going, also knowing that the reason he had not got the money to pay was because he had or intended to gamble. You had other options in mind like taking a friend or going alone, not just him ?
My concern for you is that the boundaries of your separation remain unclear and very blurry, I may be wrong but your posts (reading between the lines) seem to indicate that you are hanging on to this relaitionship not just for the sake of your daughter having contact but in the hope there will be a reconciliation and a gambling free one – I may be wrong.
It will be difficult to sustain this type of split and its one which I feel will not allow you to escape the manipulation of addiction. I can also see that in the long term it will only add to confusion and unnecessary further heartache for your daughter.
If it is over, then it is over. Arrangements are in place for him to have contact with your daughter for example – if he doesn’t show up then that is his problem, if when she is older she no longer wants to have that contact then those are his consequences – let him stew in them, and concentrate on your daughter – unfortunately you cannot save her from him or him from himself but you can soften her blow.
I know this may sound a little harsh and it is not meant that way. In my experience as long as the door remains slightly ajar you will leave yourself open to more and more of these scenarios (I’m sure that will gradually become far more inventive!!) and enable him to get off the hook. There appears to be no hint of a recovery
You will also delay your own ability to go on with your own recovery and get the life for you and your daughter that you so rightly deserve