I’m reading your posts too as they come through. Your story is certainly not NOT interesting! A little complicated, maybe, but there are many facets to it. Back in 2010 I wrote a blog entitled ‘Who am I’ it’s stored on my computer. After reading your thread and another, I re-read some of it and it could be ‘your’ story. The now ex-husband and his ‘games’, sleeping in separate bedrooms, going to counselling, the affects on my children etc etc. I was exhausted emotionally and physically, frustrated things weren’t happening faster, completely ‘drained’ with children/schools etc etc. I talk about being lonely and there must be more to life than this! I remember a time when my eldest son held me in his arms and cried, ‘We want our mum back’. I gave all of myself away to my ex and my children, my house, my work.
I look back on those times now and wonder ‘who is that lady
talking there’ it’s not ME. I understand that everything that happened HAD to happen to get me where I am today. Slowly reclaiming ME back and letting go of what I could not control has brought me where I am today.
‘I realize my CG will be having problems forever because it is not just his CG – he also is Bipolar, ADHD, Sex Addict, Compulsive eater, CG……that makes me sad but I do love him and I know he loves us..’ This is a huge statement Madge. You understand he will have these problems forever … can YOU live with it forever? Is love enough? Only you know those answers. I believe your body knows the answer to these questions already it’s whether you choose to listen to it is the question. Sending you a cyber hug and wishing you some peace. Best wishes San x