Hi MummyRichards (love that name by the way). I am on 74 today, and back in SToke after diving almost 500 miles over the weekend to see my little boy. Had him all weekend.
You ask when will recovery end? As far as I understand (finally, it took me a long time to grasp this) my recovery will never end. I will ALWAYS be in recovery because I want recovery. That’s the thing about recovery, it’s a lifetime job. That’s what it says in the Orange Book.
Recovery for me is not just about not gambling. It’s about making a new life, one without lies, deceit, hiding, being ashamed, fear, guilt. It’s about the ruth, honesty, acceptance (such as today I feel low, but that’s ok and today I feel but and that;s ok. Neither is right or wrong, it’s just the way it is.) I am going to take up mindfulness again now that I have stopped gambling. I actually learned mindfulness but I was gambling and tried to use mindfulness techniques to become a better gambler. How truly twisted is that?
Anyway, I will write more on my blog about my weekend away and what my tasks are this week. My weeks are getting busier and busier, but I am careful not to create too much stress for myself. I am in a very delicate part of my recovery.
Take care and I look forward to seeing you around. Did you do the GMA course for women? I hear great things about that, hope you got a lot from it.
Best
M