Hi Rayman,
I know what it’s like to start gambling again. I was proud to pick up my five year chip. Sometime after I just decided to gamble. I chose the place and snuck in and out like a thief. Looking over her shoulder. I continued for almost two years. Losing my self respect and lying to friends and family. I sunk pretty low in a lot of ways. Thankfully I have been back in recovery this past year almost. And I will need all the help I can get. Due to health issues I have been unable to drive until recently. But now that I’m back on the roads myself and driving by pubs and hotels and restaurants that are all set up as legal gambling venues I am unsupervised. My family including inlaws and friends know and would either not participate or rat on me to my partner. Long story! But now, i run the risk of bumping into them if I gamble again. So far I’m ok. I quickly returned to not wanting to gamble when I used this site regularly and I discussed my finances with my partner. The good news is you have experience being gamble free. Try and return to the patterns you were using when you were gamble free last time. Then try and fill any holes in your past plan. It is good to not allow ourselves access even when we feel we have it under control. The change in boss and the subsequent moving of job really had an impact on you. Sometimes its the situation that changes and that triggers feelings we want to forget. I’m glad you are here. Try and use breathing techniques and mindfulness to ease your anxiety and assist with sleep. Meditation is great, although that’s on my own to do list. You’ve done it before, you can do it again. Time to put the beast back to sleep. And if friends give you the invite, well, you just don’t gamble! Better things to do with your money and time.
take care,
Laura
Laura