#3279
velvet
Moderator

Hi Sade
I’m sorry you got the repeat official welcome message – I didn’t realise you had posted in the topic forum.

Nobody sets out of be a compulsive gambler – everybody believes at the beginning that of course they can walk away so there is no need to explain why you didn’t appreciate the great problem that this addiction can be when it comes unwelcome into your life.

At the top of this page you can see ‘Resources’ – if you click on it, the first entry is for Gamblers Anonymous. I suggest you click on it and search for the ‘Gamblers Anonymous 20 questions’ then print them off, tick the answers you know your boyfriend would say ‘yes’ to and leave it where he can find it. Many CGs (compulsive gamblers) are unaware that what they are doing is recognised and that there is real support for them if they will accept they have an addiction.

I say leave it for him to find rather than approach him verbally because his addiction will be fired up the moment it feels threatened by you and it is common for those who love CGs to end up in the middle of a argument without knowing how they got there.

I have brought up my thread ‘The F&F Cycle’ which I hope will help you realise that all that you are experiencing is understood on this forum – you are not alone.

I am not sure of the time zone you are in but I am running a group in about 3 hours and it would be great to communicate with you in real time. It is 2100-2200 hours UK time.

I believe that when you don’t know what to do it is best to do nothing until you do know. You have made a terrific start writing your thread, which I know would not have been easy. Knowledge of the addiction will give you power over it and in due course you will be able to make informed decisions. I would never suggest you go or stay – what you do ultimately will always be ‘your’ decision. I know that the addiction will have taken away your self-confidence and that includes making decisions that affect ‘your’ life. Give us time to get to know you and hopefully we can build your confidence up again.

You are the important, you matter.

Velvet