Thanks so much for your posts. I knew you would reply as I know that you too have personally experienced same. As he has done before he sent me some horrible texts, stuff my food, stuff the dishwasher, he didn’t want any of that. And then a couple of hours later, an apology saying sorry he made me cry and upset me, he is staying away at his friends And at shantis place for a few days as he has issues he needs to deal with and that being around me kept bringing up childhood stuff. I say he has crossed a line and that all I ever wanted to do was help. And I know now that he cannot live here with me, not if I value my own self worth, which I do. I had the same drained feeling I recognise from many years ago, it is called emotional abuse from someone who will always have a space in my heart. It has been the story of my life, coming into my own power and not accepting any form of abuse or control from anyone.
He pushes my buttons and I push his, but merely saying stop jeopardising social distancing by visiting his dad and friends is not an unreasonable request. He said he has tried to get counselling ,but no joy and thinks he came off the anti depressants too quickly. I agree he needs counselling. He cannot let go of the past and is repeating the male anger patterns of his childhood.
I do a gma private outreach group this evening and it was a nice share. Everyone was feeling a bit low today.
I do my class tonight which was enjoyable but I still feel like a wrung out dishcloth with tears quite close to the surface.