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Thank you for your reply, I found it fascinating. I really value it.

My son has good points, that show when the addiction is not in play. In him I see a ‘little boy’ very lost, low self esteem, a tortured soul. I see him playing at life, on a self destruct path, not knowing which way to turn. He does not have a focus, a point to get up in the morning. Now add into the mix the addiction and the lies and manipulation to get money. I don’t believe anybody likes to be lied to? And the lies can be very real. The suicide threats.

Don’t we all have our demons/vices? I would overeat when dealing with my ex husband and children. When I started my recovery and finally got away from him, I discovered why I was overeating and two reasons showed up:- cream cakes etc don’t shout at you, they became my friends, they felt good to eat but then the guilty kicked in. The other reason – if I was fat no man would show an interest in me and I wouldn’t have to deal with my ex-husband and his accusations and paranoia. I had no confidence to express how I felt at all. After recovery and alot of self work if I have ANYTHING on my mind now, I voice my opinion and work through any problems right there and then. This took 3 years of hard work to rid myself of old beliefs and replace them with good positive ones.

What did you mean by ‘Giving a wide berth to people who torment us works better?’ In what way do they torment you?

Good luck with your own recovery. Best wishes San
I like quotes and this one seemed fitting with this thread 🙂
‘Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions. — Unknown’