felt like I was writing that myself. I know exactly what you mean and I can realte to every word. The part that hurts me the most is I’ve literally always climbed out of the hole until this time. I’ve always chipped away and slowly gotten out of The mess. This time it was different , it went completely south, I never won anymore.. not even once since my initial relapse in May… roughly 15-17 times after that I never left with 1$.. just more negative in the thousands till im in the position I am now… it just showed me that gambling is pure luck. And I had no luck at all… the question is when do you stop the bleeding? I queskton myself why I didn’t stop it at 5,10,15,20… etc .. because Like you said, as long as I was still gambling.. there was at least a CHANCE, I would win… now there is none.. it hurts me in the same way it hurts you.. but I need to get mad enough to stay stopped. And think of the last 15-18 times I’ve walked out of the casino feeling like i have no soul left.. empty.. not wanting to see my friends or family, work, workout, eat right.. eat at all.. turn to alcohol, drugs, to escape what I did Through gambling.. every time I open mt
bank app.. and see everything is maxed.. that’s what makes me
not want to gamble again.. it sucks but it’s the reality I’ve created, and just like I got. Into this mess.. I have to get out.. I wish you well. Stay strong and keep pushing forward, it can get better.