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#3065
Neecy
Participant

Hi M
Thanks for your post and to all of you who I know are still thinking of me, and praying for me (Vera). Xxx Still having a tough time , lot more downs than ups, been accused of stuff I haven’t done by my CG s sister! Felt awful esp as it was New Years Day, which I should have been with him and was thinking back to last year spent together. Although in reality he’d got leg less New Years Eve and it wasn’t that good now my rose tinted glasses are off. Anyhow it upset me and angered me to be accused of trying to hurt him when all I’ve ever done is hurt myself trying to keep him happy.
My youngest daughter is struggling again and so focusing in on her and her needs is helping as not so much time to think. Not been online much as I had counseling last week and found the talking face t face hard so I needed time just not t have t think or talk about it. Been blocking it out hoping it ll go away but it hasn’t. The gaping wound is still there when u remove whatever u plaster over it t try t hide it!
Help I’m still hurting, still struggling to understand but I’ve not contacted him, on my way to a month and counting and still no intention of doing so. But on the downside I still love him and miss him desperately and would prob give my right arm to hear his voice,
Love and lots if hugs to you all
Neecy xxxxx