I met with my attorney yesterday and her team is going ahead to help me to file a legal separation. They will serve my wife’s the papers near the end of this week. This can be changed to divorce if I wish. My attorney assured me that my wife’s gambling debts would be her responsibility and not mine. She suggested that I ask for custody of my daughter for the week days and my wife/grandma for the weekend. She also told me I need to come up with a care plan for my daughter so the court can see that I have a clear and solid plan before they can grant a move away. I will provide transportation for my daughter to and from her mom/grandma.

My attorney also suggested that I sell the house eventually because I can’t rely on my wife making copayments.

Staying away and starting legal separaton have been great therapy for me. Knowing that she is in the casino doesn’t drive me into a panic attack any more but it still makes me feel sad and sorry for her. Deep down I want to go through with the separation. My selfish self wants to enjoy life, do the things I used to enjoy, have financial freedom and no anxiety. I think I have given enough. However, part of me still longing for her to recover and our family whole, especially for my daughter.

Thank you Velvet, Jenny, Twighlight and all of you for your compassion, advice and understanding.