I was in your situation 10 years ago and understand the anger, disappointment, and hope that you are going through now. I was optimistic that I could change my wife. 10 years later, $300,000 lost and we have a 2-year old daughter and I am filing for legal separation but ultimately it will be a divorce. The pain, heartache, and anxiety during this 10 years is unbearable and no one should experience it. You are still young. I just want you to know that my wife on many ocassions genuinely wants to stop gambling but she always come back to it.
My wife, intially borrowed my money to pay debts and she also usually paid them back too. But then the problem got worst and worst. She started to pawn her wedding ring and bracelet. Wrote bad checks and took money from an organization where she is a treasurer.
I know you are feeling guilty for wanting to leave. I had and currently having the same feeling. I wanted to leave her so many times but she ran out of money and then begged me to come back because she has learned her lessons and she was determine to give it up this time. We would be happy for a while and then the problem comes back again. It is amazingly diffcult to deal with the betrayal, and disappointments. At the end, we have a daughter and I thought this will surely changes her. Oh boy, I was so wrong.
Hope my story sheds some light for you.