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just noticed the date of when i first joined and it’s a year on..WOW and here i am still doing the same stupid stuff and pretty much in the same situation. tonight has been my turning point where i say enough is enough and the reason i say that tonight is a turning point as for the last few weeks i have known that i have to stop but i knew in reality i was going to get up the next and gamble and promise that it was going to be my “last one” well, tomorrow i am not going to gamble. i nearly reached that point a few weeks ago but unfortunately i was winning, winning enough to live on whilst my wages built up a little but how hard is it to give up when you are winning for a CG? so of course i have had to blow it all and then another ridiculous amount chasing it. i phoned in sick 2 days (something i never do) so i could gamble. this is how stupid and gripping the addiction is. i had nearly clawed back all the money i needed to pay my bills this month, i was £10 short of the full amount so i blew £220 trying to get the full amount, that’s how addiction works, it takes away your ability to make choices based on logic. usually i stress and start selling stuff to keep gambling when i can’t pay the bills but yes i am short this month but i’m not the first person in the world not to pay my bills on time and i wont be the last. i actually get paid on Thursday so i am to not worry and just pay people then. the most important thing is to stop, i really wish i could be one of those saturday gamblers that just have a little football bet and win or lose that’s it for the week but no matter what and no matter how many days i don’t gamble for i will never be one of those gamblers but by not gambling i am in cotrol of my addiction. looking forward to nailing my day1