I LOVE your poem Lauren.
It’s brilliant!
I wrote a few “stanzas” and before Christmas I had them published in Booklet Form and gave them as presents to some friends and family members. It was my way of “coming out” as a CG. Most people I gave them to knew I had a problem already but allowing them to read the thoughts behind the action was an eyeopener to them.
There are some people I wouldn’t dream of sharing those thoughts with.
I’m reading how you gave over your whole weekend to this GA “buddy” yet you seem to resent doing all you did for her. I have often done things like that.i.e. Allowed myself to be emotionally, physically and financially drained by “friends” then resented it madly! I wonder why we do that? Is it because we need approval? Or is it to punish ourselves? Worth thinking about.
I have less toxic people in my life these days. Partly because I refuse to allow myself to be manipulated and also because I keep my distance from people in general. I think I’m becoming a sort of a recluse. Also I don’t say what people want to hear and that scatters a lot of so called friends.
I have a soft spot for your “fella”, Lauren.
For all that ever was between ye, could you rise above past hurts and attend the Graduation as a gesture of forgiveness? He would buy your ticket of course. All on your terms and conditions and with no strings attached!
I’m very interested in your relationship with your son. I have two sons. I would need the whole night to share my tales of woe. I also have a daughter who is in Australia.
I have learned never to expect anything from my children because it brings disappointment.
“What never made you laugh, will never make you cry!”
Keep writing that poetry. It’s really really good.
Consider having it published. I have contact details for a published in NI. Very reasonable prices. The nicest man I ever “met”! He emailed me for days after I submitted very inferior work, not realizing I was dealing with a literary genius! Very humbling but he didn’t humiliate me in the least. On the contrary, he wrote a wonderful introduction to my booklet and treated me like a potential writer!
Charity is a rare and wonderful God-given human quality, Lauren.
Apply it to your decision regarding the Graduation!
Pray for the wisdom to act kindly towards the friend who hurt you deeply.
God won’t refuse to guide you.
He is LOVE!