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Thanks for your encouraging words Velvet and seeing the positive in everything I write. That takes some doing!! I notice twighlight has done this in her posts too. I hope this is how I will begin to sound at some future point!!

Your post did make me feel better. I do sometimes feel that I do not do things as they should be done and am constantly swimming in the dark. Although I notice when I’m doing things for myself the feeling subsides. Its when I’m trying to second guess my CG or start worrying I’ve done something or said something that I shouldn’t I become upset. It highlights the pointlessness of this I suppose. I do appreciate what you are saying about my CG. We have a better civil relationship at the moment. I am much more at ease with this. I do not like conflict!I do wonder however if he is really phased if im angry at all. It gives him an excuse to gamble and feel sorry for himself I assume. Although he doesn’t need any excuse. Things have calmed down on the gambling front at the moment. He appears to function in reality. Although I will stress appears as his reality is nowhere close to mine!

I have had a lovely day with my daughter and friends. We are both shattered. I have plans for the weekend and feel positive today. Thanks again!!

Kind regards
M x